Hi all, hope you've been doing well and recovering from the recent events here at HQ. I just wanted to reach out to let you all know that I've been given the go-ahead to begin the interview process for a new batch of lab technicians for Micro C. To be fair, I'm opening up the opportunity for anyone already here at the Agency who might want to transfer in and work in my lab, BEFORE I start working with the recruiting team to bring in some 'fresh blood' as it were. So, here's the job description, let me know if you're interested! Responsibilities: Possesses a thorough understanding of laboratory procedures and can reliably conduct complex analysis with increased independence. Performs a variety of complex sample preparation and analysis procedures to quantitatively measure experimental compounds in a variety of formulations and/or biological matrices. Follows validated or experimental analytical procedures with periodic direct supervision. Enters data into databases and reports. Defends the lab from intruders as necessary. Education and Experience: Bachelor's degree or equivalent and relevant formal academic / vocational qualification A direct recommendation from either the Recruitment Team or a current Agent who outranks you 3 professional references who do not work for any government agency Knowledge, Skills and Abilities: Demonstrated knowledge of multiple applicable techniques such as: ELISA, LC-MS/MS, Bio-Analytical Testing High level of proficiency with fire extinguishers Required Certifications or Clearances: Must complete Micro C Safety Training before official employment can begin Orange-level clearance required to operate in this section of the base BBP and other 'traditional' certifications may be taken into account but all relevant safety topics will be covered in the Micro C Safety Training
You might also want to be invincible to all forms of damage, up to, and including the iron hooks of a pissed of pagan deity.
That's sort of a general HQ thing rather than my lab specifically. Recruiting tends to cover that with the newer hires and anyone who's still alive at this point probably gets the idea.
I mean, I'd have to ask, but I bet we could get a dedicated firefighting team for HQ together.... At this point it seems like a logical step to take.
I should probably mention, sometimes I get frustrated and just hit people over the head with the extinguisher!!
A dedicated aged fire-fighting team, you say? I have extensive emergency medic training, as well as crisis management skills. I spent too many years as a paramedic to let those skills go to waste. Sadly, I have zero lab experience.
I think the recruiting team won't have too much trouble finding folks with lab experience outside of HQ, I'm not so worried about that. But maybe we should have some sort of inter-departmental Volunteer Fire Department thing going on?
If there is anything I can do from a distance then I don't get frustrated, but I guess that's not such a great help when fire fighting in a lab!
Erm, I was voluntold by superiors to apply. Name: Cass La'Roux Major: Liberal Arts w/ Minor in Applied BioChem Prof. w/ standard issue rifle and sidearm I can bypass clearance by crawling in the air ducts, right?
Uh... No. But you should be able to get Orange clearance without too much trouble, if they've specifically told you to apply to work in my lab. Double check your clearances on the nearest terminal, you may have had a clearance upgrade and just not been told. That being said, you can come in to interview whenever your clearances are high enough to get to this part of HQ.
W Wow, my superiors are terrible at communication. I checked the terminal like you said. Orange clearance and I didn't even know! So what do you say, new Meat Shield/Fetch Monkey?
Come on down for an interview, but given your uh... Qualifications, I think that's about where you'll wind up on the totem pole.
is Micro-C still recruiting? I'm recently recruited to TBW and therefore not yet affiliated to any of the facilities in HQ. at the moment there's some administrational hassle regarding my resume, so i'll hand them over personally, if that won't be a problem. It must be noted that I'm specilised but not limited to virology
Internal recruitment is ongoing, I've finished my recruitment of new agents from non-Agency personnel. We can always use more virologists in the lab, stop on by to drop off a resume and have a chat.
If you have the time, ill come by right away. Is there anything i need to know beforehand? *files resume and sends forward to MidDipper*
You should probably know that the "chance you'll die a horrible painful death" goes up to 65% from about 28% when you start working in Micro C.
You'll have to go through safety training if you're accepted onto the lab tech team. It's fairly intensive and you'll need to bring your own galoshes. Also I require that all lab techs carry a permanent mark for the duration of their employment in the lab, I'm a bit paranoid about imposters. It's nothing too painful and isn't hard to conceal in mixed company.
I am assuming Dylan is just joking Right? I mean, since there seem to be strict protocolls, there should be a very low chance of anything going wrong. right? and what about these marks, shouldnt a good old fashioned DNA swap be conclusive enough? at a certain age, even twins aren't identical anymore.
